Friday, December 3, 2010

Ryan

My Ryan is 4!! My Ryan is just a million things!! He is a sweet heart, can be sensitive at times, he rarely likes to cuddle, can not sit still, makes everyone laugh by saying and doing the funniest things and many many more!!!

Ryan was born at 31 weeks weighing in at 4lbs 14oz and 19 inches long. To this day I have No idea why he came so early!! =*(  He was long and so so skinny!! Ryan stayed in the NICU for 30 days! On Monday September 4, 2006 Ryan took a turn for the worst. We lived in a hotel room because the NICU was an hour away from where we lived. I sat trying to eat breakfast but I had a bad pain in my gut. Can't explain the feeling. My husband and son were eating there breakfast so slow it seemed. I stood up and said "I can't eat. I need to go see Ryan NOW!! Either you all hurry up or I'm leaveing you here." I got up and walked away. The look on there face of unknown!! They finished up and we were off.

We walked into the doors and I saw Ryans nurse. She looked at me with sadness and said he is not doing good!! (What?!?!?!?!!!) She explained that there not sure whats going on. His blood presure is super low and his heart is beating super fast. They just gave him morphine and are going to watch him. It "might" be a disease called NEC in the intestines but there not sure. The doc's are thinking if he doesn't get any better they might take him for an "Exploritory Surgery"!!  "Exploritory Surgery!! Morphine!! Not Sure What It is!! Disease!! NEC!! Blood Presure super low! Heart beating super fast!!"   I looked at my husband hoping he could catch me as I was about ready to fall. He wasn't ready either!! He was pale white and staring at my son! (Knowing my husband skin is tan!) I thought he was going to lose it!! I picked my self up and told him I need to go pump for some milk. I was nursing Ryan. He didn't say a word.

I walked away with my legs shakeing. I wanted to fall, curl up in a ball, and scream at God!! How dare he take my son away!! I went to the mom's room and started pumping. The tears rolled out! I was saying "Please God..Please God..Please God..Don't take my baby away!!!" Over and over, crying and crying!! After a couple of minutes screaming, I felt a calmness come through me. I sat and thought, "Everyone is praying for my son! I believe in prayer and I know that God above is listening! I need to have faith! Believe in GOD!! Trust in GOD!! He answers prayers. It might not be what I want now but its what he thinks is best!! What ever his decision is I have to TRUST!! He knows what he is doing!!" I finished what I was doing and walked back to my Ryan and husband! I told Raul my husband what I thought! "Believe in God and Trust in God!! God will take care of this!!" He looked at me like I was crazy but didn't say a word! He knew I should have been the first to loose it!! My husdand and I stayed that night by Ryan's bedside. Not sure if we were going to loose our baby!!

Through that night Ryan began to stabelize himself. He wasn't out of the woods but getting better!! He had a pole of 5 different meds going into his little body!! Around 5 a.m. he started moving. He was tucked in a snug fit blanket. Ryan pulled out his legs and feet and then quickly tried to put them back in again!! (To this day he HATES for his feet to be cold or exposed to cold)!! From that moment the meds started coming off and he started to get better and better. Praise God!!

I love this story because my Ryan went through so much!! He is a healthy 4 year old now!! Praise God!! I also love how God came over me and showed me how to Trust and Believe!! I left it all to God!!

I try hard to take each one of my baby's on a mom and son date!! Miley has not had her turn because she is still to young! I am hoping to try to get Ryan to go with me on a Mom and Son ice cream date this weekend!! I have asked him and he says "Ok, but Dad, Miley and Raul can come too!" We will have to see if it will work!!

Have a Good Weekend!!

Hug your children tight!! They grow Way to fast!! Don't blink!! ;)  <3

Thursday, December 2, 2010

My Thoughts!! Bleh..Bleh..Bleh..

Thanksgiving is over and everything turned out nice! It usually does! We did our 3 day eating from house to house!! =) Bleh on turkey and ham!! I can't believe how fast time is flying by!! Christmas is almost here!! Whoa!!

Change of subject! Christmas!!

I went shopping on BlackFriday at midnight!! Haha!! Yup!! I saw they were going to start with some things at midnight at Wal-Mart. Electronics started at 5a.m. So off I went alone!! Wal-Mart was open and you got to see where everything was. Shoppers behaved them selves and waited until they announced over the intercom to start shopping! It was not bad!! Not as bad as the rush you get when you wait outside in line, the door opens, and everyone rushes inside not knowing where anything is!! Haha!! I think I am done shopping for all the kiddos in the family!! I still need to get my kiddos, parents, and in-laws!! Not to bad!! My secret is I start shoppping since August!! I have 18 nieces and nephews on hubby's side, 2 nieces and nephews on my side, and 10 kids on my dad side. Yup..30 kiddos all together!! It's not to bad when you start in August and bargain shop!! Sssshhhhh My secret!! ;) Now I have all these presents at home, wrapping paper, and no tape! Great!! I really, really, really, hope I dont procrasinate wraping gifts this year. I hate wrapping gifts!! Takes so long and then they tear it up!! Maybe I will let the kiddos wrap this year!! On the day of Christmas Eve last year, I was still wrapping gifts, half ready, house a mess, hubby had to run into work (So he said!! LOL!! Kidding!!), children running around, I was trying to bake the dish I was taking to my in-laws, and my neighbors came over to give us a gift!! It was a crazy lovely day!! My neighbors still talk to me so I don't think I scared them away!! =)

We have decorated our tree. I had a tree that we used over and over. It was pretty and I bought it one year the day after Christmas and scord a heck of a deal on it!! It has finally come to its death!! RIP our 10 year old tree!! So off to find another tree hubby went!! All the decorations were out so we NEEDED to find one ASAP!! Not to pricey but he found one!! It works!! I still liked my other tree better!! We are still working on decorateing outside!! Its been so cold that we all were waiting for snow!! Nope...Nothing has fallen!! Oh well!! I know soon it will happen and then we will be tired of it!! =)

Here is Our New Christmas Tree!!


I'm not sure I get many readers here!! LOL!! It's ok!! BUT..If you want to leave me a comment that would be nice!! =)